Dean, to the physics department: ``Why do I always have to give you guys so much money, for laboratories and expensive equipment and stuff. Why couldn't you be like the math department - all they need is money for pencils, paper and waste-paper baskets. Or even better, like the philosophy department. All they need are pencils and paper.''
A philosopher, a physicist, a mathematician and a computer scientist were travelling through Scotland when they saw a black sheep through the window of the train.
``Aha,'' says the philosopher, ``I see that Scottish sheep are black.''
``Hmm,'' says the physicist, ``You mean that some Scottish sheep are black.''
``No,'' says the mathematician, ``All we know is that there is at least one sheep in Scotland, and that at least one side of that one sheep is black!''
``Oh, no!'' shouts the computer scientist, ``A special case!''